First of all I was hotter than hell with that heater vent right up above me. If I'm hot I can't sleep. Doesn't matter if it's winter or summer. If there is any sweating going on, there won't be any sleeping going on.

I had such a nice quiet afternoon. I ran to mom's and we ran out to Sam's and then to the mall and Sears and Best Buy and Bath and Body Works and just all over. Then we had BK for supper and I went home. Cass went to Kearney to Disney On Ice with her dad and had a fabulous time.

Overall it was a quiet day. But I've got a lot on my mind.

I've been having some health issues. I haven't really talked about it here at all. I lay in bed at night and think about it. Something is NOT right. I always freak out this time of year because two years ago on December 3rd was when I had my MAJOR surgery and we all know how THAT went. I was talking to my mom about it today and from what I was describing sounded like what she went through about 15 years ago. And I keep laying in bed thinking "Okay, I need to call the doctor, who will probably send me to my OB and if I have to have surgery I have to wait until this semester is out, but do it before next semester starts and oh....I can't take any fucking time OFF because I can't afford it." When in the hell did I become that girl? That stubborn person who can't take a day off to have something important done because she doesn't have the time or the money? Oh and hello, did I tell you I completely over-analyze things? If I haven't or you haven't figured it out, hello I'm Joey, I'm an over-analyzer nice to meet you. Roll your eyes all you want, something is NOT RIGHT with me. We know our bodies better than any doctor, better than anybody else. And I can safely say something isn't jivin here. So I guess I'll call the doctor on Tuesday (you know, can't miss school tomorrow) and see what's up.

Some days it would be cool to just have the baggage taken out of the compartment if you know what I mean but then it wouldn't be possible for me to have children. Not that I want any more children because I don't, but stripping the right away from me just in case would devastate me. Anyway, I'm not even going to go there.

This is the shit I lay in bed and think about at night. But you would too if you have a period every 2 weeks that lasts a week and a half and you feel like you should buy actual stock in Proctor & Gamble.

I know I'm getting ahead of myself here. So while I'm ahead I'm going to attempt to go back to bed and maybe just turn on the fan. Maybe then I'll actually get some sleep. But I highly doubt it. Grizmom - 2005-11-21 16:05:52
Been there, done this already. (not surgery, but the period that never ends)I remember just crying and telling my OB that it was wrecking my life. He's all "let's just give it some time..." yeah whatever buddy! I'd had a period from Oct. 6 - April ?. WAIT for what?? For me to need a transfusion? So, I took my best friend - the nurse I told you about - and off we went to visit him. Oh, he would be happy to work with me then! JERK! But, he did medicate me and it's helped so much, as long as I take my meds as I should - without being late or skipping any days. Otherwise, it starts all over again and lasts forever. I have asked him to "clear out the baggage" in anyway he can - the indometrial ablasion would be super! But he won't even consider it until I'm AT LEAST 40. I so badly want to say to him "if this was YOUR wife who was having her life and clothes wrecked, would you take care of it???" Anyway, hang in there. See the doc and know we're here for you!
-------------------------------